When Mama called asking if she could move in, I thought that I could handle it. I've been telling her for years that when the time came, of course she could live with me. I'm still flabbergasted at how utterly unprepared I was for the reality of the actual move.
First, I didn't truly think that it would be this soon. Second, I underestimated her level of neediness/demanding-ness. I have two children that I homeschool and an already full schedule of responsibilities that I had before Mama moved in. She resents the time that I spend doing those things, and I resent her resenting it. She moved into our lives, not the other way around. Still, she expects me to drop everything RIGHT NOW to do whatever it is she wants me to do. Like last week, I hopped in the shower for about two minutes when she started screaming for me. I jumped out, shampoo in my hair, water flying everywhere, slipping on the hardwood floors, to find that she wanted to know the price of stamps. Really. The woman was screaming like she had fallen down three flights of stairs and broken both hips while her hair was on fire.
Now, to be fair, she is sick. She has lung cancer, again. She was first diagnosed about four years ago and was in remission. Then they discovered a second mass in her upper lobe on the same side about a year ago. She was undergoing treatment in Florida but it wasn't going well, she couldn't manage her medication, she lost the ability to drive (mostly due to over-medicating herself), and she needed care but didn't want anyone to come into the house and the help she had available family-wise are unreliable at best, with the exception of her wonderful sister, who was just burned out. So I moved her up to Virginia.
It's like having a VERY pessimistic, bossy, rude child. All the time. I get that she's homesick and lonely but is it too much to ask that she at least be polite and nice once in awhile? Last night she called me into her room (no hair on fire this time at least) and said "I need pain pills, NOW. Go get me some." Hmm, is there maybe another way we could ask? I'm trying to stay positive and teach my children that you should do any task joyfully. I'm finding it difficult to be a good role model for that.
I hope that this will get easier, less taxing on my soul, happier. I plan to use this blog to vent. There isn't anyone really who wants to listen to me rant about all the inane things that happen in my day so I'm documenting them here. Hopefully it will keep my eye-twitching to a minimum.
